Kilson Street’s Top 5 People (we hate) of 2015
A Simple List for those motherfuckers that just couldn’t cut it in 2015. Hopefully these assholes don’t show up on our list in 2016.
5: Donald Trump: Donald Trump could be the nation’s 1st insult-comic President. Then again, he’d also be our 1st oompa loompa truly orange President…. In fact, history’s 1st 100% asshole President.
4. Sean Penn: Sean Penn looks like the angriest guy on Earth. Yes, he can act, but he is one angry motherfucker. Sean Penn looks like he’s always ready to commit murder. Plus throw in all his violent history and we have a sociopath. Sean Penn is one fuck-up away from prison.
3: Bill Cosby: Bill Cosby, stop raping people. Jesus Christ. What’s up with Bill Cosby? All that fame and money and he still has to commit crimes against humanity. Bill, keep your pudding pop in your pants for once.
2. ISIS: Look, stop it. We get it. There’s not much to do in the desert. You’re not allowed to have fun or a beer or even engage in coitus. Your lives are fucked up, but the problem isn’t out there– it’s you. You have replaced love with hate and that’s where you went all wrong. Hatred will never bring you peace.
1. Donald Trump: once again, Donald Trump is such a huge asshole, we had to put him on this list twice. Look, we expect much more from a Presidential candidate and when we hear you want to ban Muslims and deport Mexicans and bomb the hell out of everyone, well, it’s a cause of worry. WHY? Because any President of the United States should NOT sound like a fascist. You are using FEAR and HATRED as the basis of your campaign and it’s very, very disturbing to feel like we’re one hop, skip, and a jump away from 1930’s Germany.
Thank you for reading, audience. Have a prosperous and happy New Year. May 2016 be filled with love.